Why I Love Killjoys

"Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na)" - My Chemical Romance

I’ve interrupted the usual schedule (the amazingly long Blog introduction) to have a small celebration. Please forgive my giddiness!

I think I’ve been a killjoy since the moment I was born, but it seems like it’s only been in the last year that I’ve actually found my place in life. Coming through everything that I’ve been through, it’s sometimes hard for me to feel "normal" or like I fit in anywhere. I’m not saying I’m lonely, because I couldn’t be lonely with the amazing family and friends that I have. But I feel different a large portion of the time.

Six years ago, a small part of the puzzle fell into place for me. I was dealing with my illness very badly at the time; still cutting and drinking very heavily. But then I heard "I’m Not Okay (I Promise)" and something inside me smiled. Here was a band, that didn’t pretend to have all the answers, who had problems just like everyone else in the world (some of them incredibly serious), but whom had sheer talent, and told the world to go to hell, everyday, with a smile on their faces.

I saw My Chemical Romance live for the first time on a Friday in November of 2005. That feels a life-time ago now! I’ve changed so much in that time, and part of my personal growth has been helped by the most amazing band ever to grace the stage. At my first concert, Gerard Way made a rather emotional speech about suicide and self-harm. Rather than advocating self-harm, as a large amount of ignorant non-believers presume, they speak of seeking helping, talking, and working through your problems. That night, Gerard told me, and a large crowd of fans, to never give up. I haven’t cut myself since.

Over the years, I’ve become a devoted fan; I’m now currently tallying five My Chem concerts, over six years. I’d love to get this figure higher, and know that over the years, I’m sure to do so. My Chemical Romance is not just a band; it’s a leap of faith. A leap that every fan has taken, and will defend to the death.

As the band have grown, I feel that I too have grown. Danger Days was a big turning point for me. As ever, I was extremely pleased with My Chem’s work, but this time I could dance to my heart’s content (and I frequently do). Becoming a killjoy has given me a massive boost in confidence, and sometimes I sport my gutsy alter-ego like a defence barrier, but at the same time, I feel like I have thousands of people behind me. As a killjoy, you always have people fighting your corner.

The killjoy family, and MCRmy, can be a smile, a hug, a home, or just a chat about some decent music, but it’s always there for you. Any that’s why I love, not only all members of My Chemical Romance (keep up the good work guys), but everyone who has the courage to stand up and say "I am a Killjoy".